Tag Archives: people
People Skills – Are You a Perpetually Positive Person?
I decided to start humming. Hummm…Hummm…Hummm… Hummm…Hummm…
This attracted a few weird looks. I wasn’t doing it very loud, just spreading a joyful noise and smiling like I knew something no one else knew…which I did. The person next to me smiled and nodded at me, and so did the person two people ahead in line. As a matter of fact, it seemed like everyone standing near me began to lighten up and become a bit cheerier.
Now this could have only been my imagination (it’s pretty active), and it could have just been the fact that in less than a minute, I changed my attitude, which made the whole situation seem different. But the end result was magic! The line seemed to move faster and I was now making others smile.
That day I was standing in what seemed like an endless line at my local retail store. I looked around and noticed that it seemed like we were all resigned to our waiting fate. The cashiers were trying to do their best, but there wasn’t a smile in the vicinity. No uplifted lips on the cashiers or the customers that were waiting. It was like one long line of resignation… until I started humming.
My point to all of this is “Why are we letting a situation determine our attitude?” Why is it that we will put up with humorless lines, rude people, long waits and endless seriousness when we could be putting a little more grace, happiness and joy into even the tiniest of daily tasks?
Maybe you do this already. BRAVO if you do! Is being a perpetually positive person part of your personality? (Whoa, the P thing got away from me!) If you’re one of those perpetually positive people…please stand in line by me, drive on my part of the highway, and please be the person on the other end of my phone line. I need you, and the whole world needs you!
If you aren’t inclined to be a PPP (Perpetually Positive Person) than maybe you can start now. Why? Because being positive does a whole lot of good for the world. But even more importantly, it does a whole lot of good for you. Being positive helps improve your health, makes your face wrinkle less, and lowers your body fat. (Okay, the body fat part was my wishful thinking). But it’s a proven fact that happier people live longer.
How can you go about becoming a Perpetually Positive Person (PPP)? I thought you’d never ask!
1. Wear that smile! Plaster it on your face the minute you wake up and don’t take it off until you go to bed. Even when you’re alone you should wear a smile. A wonderful expert in skin care and cosmetics suggested that a person earns their face. Meaning that as you age, your resting demeanor and how you think and behave on a continuous basis contributes to your facial lines. If you keep a smile or slight grin going you will age more gracefully, have a lot more friends, and fewer wrinkles to boot! I’m very serious about this. The power of a smile is underrated because all of us think we smile all the time, but in reality we don’t. So now is the time to turn up the corners of those lips!
2. Think happy thoughts! The challenge with this one is that we are bombarded daily with negative messages. Okay, so don’t read or listen to the news. Also think of the positive points of each and every situation. This is easier the more you practice it. One technique I have used successfully is to pray a happy prayer whenever I hear something bad. A war in the Middle East? Please God let those people work it out. Some teen set a cat on fire? I pray that the teen gets the help he or she needs, and I pray the cat hasn’t used up all nine of its lives. It’s not that I’m heartless; it’s that I know I can only change the world if I can keep myself from getting jaded and negative. I’m not in control of other people, and neither are you, but we are both in control of one very important thing, our own thoughts. Keep them happy and positive and we can change any situation.
3. Say “Please” & “Thank-you.” This is something that seems to have gone the way of white gloves. People and customers expect so much, but if we asked a little nicer and were a bit more grateful the world would be a much better place to do business. Wouldn’t you agree? Graciousness begins with you and me. I’ve found that from time to time we begin to lose these little niceties with our families. We no longer ask our spouse to get something, we demand it (in the nicest way I’m sure), or we tell our children to do something and expect them to comply without our demonstrating politeness. Often forgetting that whatever they do deserves recognition and thanks. Some people don’t say please and thank-you because they forget, some don’t say it because they think it weakens them, and some don’t say it from pure laziness. Whatever the reason, I know that none of us, even those that are pretty good at remembering to say please and thank-you say it enough. We can never be too polite when asking for things and never too grateful when receiving a request. Add these little words to the beginning and ending of most of your sentences and you’ll be surprised at how wonderful people begin to treat you!
You now have an opportunity to make a difference. I’ve given you three tips that when practiced regularly can be the start of an incredible change for you. I wish you a future filled with perpetually positive people!
If you want to attract more prospects, multiply loyal customers, and boost sales, this Schuh is a fit! Shawna Schuh is an extraordinary storyteller, who works with corporations and associations to develop environments that help people bring their best selves to the work they do. Shawna addresses any and all issues relating to people skills. Her presentations are humorous, overflowing with energy and packed with practical results driven information that will positively maximize profits. Take an action that will help you succeed and improve your people skills visit: http://shawnaschuh.com/Ultimate%20year2.php
Related Positive Mindset Articles
Positive Psychology – What Makes People Happy is Pleasure
Smart Alek: I have been working very hard lately. Soon I will have my great reward.
Aleks Psych: What will that be?
Smart Alek: I will never work again.
Aleks Psych: What will you do if you do not work?
Smart Alek: What else, expect everyone else to look after me and vehemently complain if they try to stop! Their frustration and pain will be my ultimate pleasure.
All positive psychology practitioners agree that one crucial aspect in the psychology of what makes people happy is the development of pleasure. The seeking of pleasure underlines everything that we do. Even when we decide to do an activity that we know will not be pleasurable in the short term, we do it in the hope of it leading to an eventual outcome that will be pleasurable.
The research into how to become a happy person has shown that the pleasurable feelings and things that make people happy in the short term are not the most important factors in living a fulfilling life. Having a life filled only with pleasurable activities will not sustain most people as we need to have a greater sense of purpose that is effortful and aimed at benefiting others. I will address these issues in other articles. However, becoming a martyr is not how to become a happy person either. A life with little to no pleasure will lead to burn out.
When it comes to the psychology of happiness, learning how to become a happy person requires you to understand and develop the activities that you find the most pleasurable and know how to use them in order to increase the quality of your life. I have broken up the pleasurable things that make people happy into 2 categories, they are Regular Pleasures and Reward Pleasures. In daily life, it is important to have a few standard pleasures that are practiced regularly to make life enjoyable but in order to pull yourself towards growing as a person and achieving your greater goals, you need to create reward pleasures that you can only receive once you have earned them.
One of the flaws in the common psychology of what makes people happy in modern life, is many people are so used to immediate gratification that they will never obtain the full pleasurable feeling that comes from a reward that they have worked to earn. Compared to previous generations, luxury item debts are ludicrously high, and yet current generations are not happier. That is because the novelty of a fancy toy or experience that you did not work hard to obtain wears off quite quickly. You can not live a non challenging lifestyle and expect to feel intense pleasure. However, if your toy or experience is an honest and fair reward based on what you have accomplished, the potential pleasure of that reward once obtained is considerably greater.
When I decided to become a life skill coach and began work on my coaching program ‘Fulfilling Happiness’ one thing I really wanted was a motorcycle. However, I did not buy one. Instead I decided to make it my reward for when the program is completed. I can afford a motorcycle, especially when considering all I am seeking is an older bike that I can learn on. But I knew if I bought one, I would spend too much time on it learning and it would distract me from a more important and meaningful goal. That is why at the time of this article, I am still without a motorcycle as ‘Fulfilling Happiness’ is almost, but not quite complete. But that is ok, because in a short time it will be complete, and I will savour every moment of my sweet 100% deserved, completely guilt-free ride.
Positive Psychology: What makes people happy? Exercise: Write out a list of your current regular pleasures. (E.g. TV shows, social engagements, sports, reading, hobbies, creative pursuits etc) in your life and your larger pleasures (E.g. New products, holidays, special events etc). Then rank your regular pleasures in order of importance and plan how you could increase the time you spend on your favourites and decrease the time spent on ones that are not that enjoyable. With your larger pleasures, write down what important activities you need to accomplish first (and within what time frame) before rewarding yourself with them.
Aleks Srbinoski is a Clinical and Coaching Psychologist, Company Consultant, Creative Writer and Author, Humorist and Inspirational Motivational Speaker.
More Positive Mindset Articles
Inner Peace – How to Stay Positive When Dealing With Negative People
You may have limited control over your circumstance but you can have total control over your emotional response to your circumstance. In this article you are going to learn two things that you can do to have total control over your emotions and have a positive response in a negative situation every time. The two steps are 1) Identify your triggers and 2) Replace your negative thoughts with positive actions.
Step #1: Identify Your Triggers
1. Keep a journal of all of the things that ticks you off for a week
2. Each time that you are ticked off, ask yourself “Why do I react negatively to this situation?” “What is it about this particular situation that gets to me in this way?”Write down your thoughts in numerical sequence in your journal.
3. At the end of the week, review your journal and identify what you were thinking each time that you felt ticked off.
Step #2: Replace Negative Thoughts with Positive Action
1. Now that you are able to identify the reasons why certain people and situations ticks you off, your next step is to write out several positive ways that you can respond to each of the items that you listed in your journal that ticks you off.
2. Practice role-playing with a partner. Pretend that you are in a particular situations or you are in the presence of the type of person that ticks you off.
3. You should practice until you are comfortable responding positively to the negative situation so that when you encounter a negative situation you are not triggered to respond with negative actions.
The way that you are going to maintain a state of inner peace is by not being stressed out. You have to learn how to be positive and stay calm in situations that are negative. At the end of this exercise, you will be able to take positive actions the next time that you encounter negative people and negative situation because you will not be taken off guard. You will not respond based on your emotional state at the time of the negative event because you will be prepared to recognize your triggers and you will be well rehearsed on how to take positive actions when you are faced in your trigger situations.
Antionette Tate enjoys helping people to discover their inner peace and joy.
http://howtohaveasuccessfulday.blogspot.com
http://www.squidoo.com/antionettetate
How to Be Positive – Stay Away From Negative People
Today is a good reflection of how far I have come from negative thinking to positive thinking and positive actions. I was coaching a client who is processing her breakdowns in a stuck state, the feeling of confusion whether the forward actions is going to create the result she wanted. It reminded me of how I got a Life Coach to work with me and experience being positive most of the time.
Stay away from negative people
Don’t make the mistake of talking to the wrong people. People who are negative. Either they have had bad experiences because of lack of knowledge or strategies or they have no clarity of their own direction. They do not have positive experiences to share with you. Stay away from them.
The solution is to talk to people who are already successful in doing what you wanted to do. Model after them. Get them to mentor you, or collaborate with them. They will have many success stories to share with you. That would give you more confidence, support and encouragements to move forward.
Get a Life Coach
There is a great difference with talking to a Life Coach or your friend. The positive thinking and the positive energy from a Coach is uplifting. Most of my clients said, I wish the people out there could be as positive as you. The way they talked are “noise” that often held them back from the decision that they want to make. As a result, they become indecisive. It’s through some powerful questions that clients become clear with their thoughts. When clients are sure of what making that decision would give them, e.g. More confidence, more time to have a balance life, better relationships with family and more income, they are open to taking positive actions.
“Noise” are unfounded fears from people who may mean well, thinking that they are protecting you; But they do not know what you really want. It’s based on their own pattern of thinking and their own fear which is projected onto you and is quite often negative. Unknowingly, they operate from fear.
How a Life Coach can help
A Life Coach can certainly help you with the breakthrough from thinking negatively to thinking positively and taking actions that move you towards achieving the outcome you want. This is the support and encouragements that most people need, to have a breakthrough. The positive energy is automatically transferred to you. The confidence is projected onto you. These comes from having experienced that journey.
Get free tips from http://www.mindset-coaching.com and free downloads of her E-Book.
Dating For HIV Positive People
Thanks to technology and continuing HIV awareness, dating for HIV positive people has become much easier and less humiliating than in previous years. Most importantly, an HIV positive person does not have to take their chances in clubs and other such places – online dating is here, and it’s thriving.
Dating for HIV Positive People in the ‘Real World’
Of course, online dating in specific HIV-related dating sites is not the only option, nor should it be considered so. With certain strategies and an ability to read people, an HIV-infected person can still enjoy the more ‘traditional’ dating scene. It is important to note, however, that care must be taken.
There is much stress over the question of when to disclose to a potential partner your HIV status. The best answer in my experience is this: before there is any physical contact of any kind.
Now, educated people know that a harmless kiss is not going to transmit HIV, but not everyone knows this. Since it is certainly not unheard of for some people to have violent reactions when a partner discloses their HIV status, the best thing to do is err on the side of caution and reduce the risks of that happening – especially for women.
Here are the important points to keep in mind to avoid an excessive reaction:
 Disclose early in the ‘intimacy cycle’
 Disclose when both of you are sober
 If you think there may be a problem, disclose in a relatively public place
You will generally find that if you show respect for other people’s health and allow them to make the decision of risk, they will return the respect back to you.
Online Dating for HIV Positive People
The great thing about online dating, especially in ‘themed’ sites that cater to HIV singles, is that the disclosure question is off the table. When the disclosure question is off the table, people you won’t be consumed by your condition – and neither will anyone else. The other great thing is that you can be discreet if you like, and only send photos to members with whom you have built a trust rather than in your general profile.
Now, not all HIV dating sites are created equal, and in fact many of them are rather depressing. The key is to find one or two that are really popular, with members who are actually active. The easy winner in this category is PositiveSinglesOnline.com as it has been around for years and promotes itself really well to avoid that ‘ghost town’ feel. They also allow you to create a free profile so you can go in and search for matches before having to pay anything for a membership.
Find More Positive Mindset Articles
Positive Attitude and Reading People
Go to http://www.babelgum.com/dilbert to see all the new cartoons!
http://www.dilbert.com/animation by Scott Adams. RingTales presents Dilbert Animated Cartoons. Positive Attitude and Reading People. In Positive Attitude, Dilbert is unable to maintain a positive attitude. In Reading People, the pointy haired boss can’t tell if Wally is working.
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For Success You Must Have a Positive Attitude and Mix With Positive People
There is certainly more to a positive attitude than first meets the eye. For by having a positive attitude you suddenly find most of the following benefits, and positive attitude becomes part of you. Next, you will realize that without thinking, beautiful things begin to happen.
Take note of these right now, for when you begin to get the idea of positive thinking, these are your rewards.
You have to say to yourself, each of them is what I want and what I need.
-Positive thinking, Constructive thinking. -Creative thinking, Expecting success. -Optimism, Motivation to accomplish your goals. -Being inspired. Choosing happiness. -Not giving up. Looking at failure and problems as blessings in disguise. -Believing in yourself and in your abilities. Displaying self-esteem self-respect and confidence. -Looking for solutions. Seeing opportunities.
Each one of these mentioned above is very important to your existence and each of them will improve your whole life. Take each of these and begin working on them. I would suggest you download Napoleon Hill’s wonderful book “Think and Grow Rich” if you want to have a detailed understanding of the power of positive attitude and the power of your subconscious mind.
As an uneducated man, I am pleased to tell you that I have had a pretty successful life, not just in the business world, but in marriage and with family. I assure you being positive is far better than having those negative thoughts that were forever with me when I was young.
Please take another look at the list above and go over each of them carefully, for each has a message you should investigate.
Once you have that positive attitude your life will never be the same again.
To be positive you have to never mix with negative people, what happens they bring you down, a little negative here and a little there is just like pricking a balloon and deflate slowly.
Find More Having A Positive Attitude Articles
Positive Personalities Attract People
Ever notice how attractive someone is when they speak about things that are positive? They have a natural tendency to always look at the cup as half full, not empty. Every situation they experience, even negative ones, turn into something they are grateful for.
Positive thinkers always see the BIG picture. They don’t dwell on their mistakes of the past but look forward to how they will change things to do it better next time. By never staying stuck for too long shows others anything is possible.
Reflecting on the past is only useful when you can take action today for a brighter tomorrow.
The next time you meet someone who has high energy and appears to be optimistic, observe their personality. Are you interested in what they say? Do you feel hopeful and encouraged when you leave them? Did they inspire you to take action in something worth while?
The person who thinks positively usually has endless possibilities and empowers others to feel the same. They are usually called by their friends, family and others whenever someone needs to have their spirits lifted. When someone is down or expressing negativity they need to be motivated to change. It’s a proven fact that if you are radiating vibrant energy, other people that need a charge will gravitate to you.
Just by being around someone that is positive, you will start to look at your world differently and become more positive yourself. Personally, when I meet a motivational speaker or listen to someone that has achieved success, love, fulfillment and abundance; I want to get to know them better. I am drawn to them and their conversations like a magnet. I almost feel enlightened by their stories of hope, wisdom and passion.
How to be Positive
Find a topic you love to talk about
Always speak highly of everyone you know
Promise to embrace change
Become the one who finds the blessings in every situation
Wish only goodwill to your competitors
Never argue or raise your voice
Encourage someone with your support
Offer endorsements of people you would recommend
Make a difference in someone’s life
Become a mentor
Stop watching the news
Live by the Optimist’s Creed
Each day make a conscious effort to be more positive. Watch, listen and learn from other people that have a positive attitude. Observe how they handle their own business or life situations.
Norman Vincent Peale wrote the book, “The Power of Positive Thinking” which continues to be a priceless classic. He talks about the traits that positive thinkers possess and how you can adopt the same mindset. Try this experiment, remove all negative words that end in n’tsuch as can’t, won’t, haven’t, shouldn’t, etc. Do this for at least one week and see how often you are actually saying them.
Turn off the negative thoughts and replace them with something positive. Rephrase your comments and conversations to reflect a more positive outcome. Anytime you hear yourself saying something that lowers your energy, think of a way to say it again that lifts your energy.
Children are masters of positive thinking; we can all take lessons from these young experts. They look at the world through bright eyes and seem naturally optimistic.
The old saying to look at life through rose colored glasses just might be a good way of thinking until it becomes a reality. In today’s world, keeping positive can be a big challenge especially when there is so much depression all around us. Many people are experiencing major changes due to the current state of our economy. However, there are also great opportunities all around us at any given time; we just have to stay open to seeing them. In every crisis, there is a gift and life lesson to learn. Never look at the situation as hopeless, it is only temporary and bound to change for the better.
Traditionally, most things have a life cycle. The stock market will crash and then thrive again. There are peaks and valleys, ebb and waves, ups and downs all around us. How we respond to the negative situation determines how long it stays with us.
Limit the time you spend with negative people and surround yourself with others that think BIG. In general, people are attracted to those who see things with a positive viewpoint. The choice is yours; it is up to you to decide how you would prefer to handle situations. If you are seriously interested in networking to grow your business, focus on all the positives and you’ll attract an abundance of people to you!
Darlene Willman, aka The Sassy Networker, is a keynote speaker, author and coach, specializing in small business networking and referrals. She provides resources, connections and support to entrepreneurs, small business owners and other professionals that have a strong desire to promote their companies through relationship marketing. She will show you how to build an incredible network of people who refer business to each other plus so much more. You can start receiving her eZine, The Networking Focus (a value) by visiting http://www.SassyNetworker.com
On the downsides of positive attitude (optimism bias), on poor people having kids [antinatalism]
Comment here http://uriupina.com/philosophy-psychology/negatives-positivity-video
Talking about what’s wrong with being optimistic and having a “positive attitude” (giving in to our optimism bias) and on poor people having kids. [antinatalism]
